Emma Talks Nerdy About: Listening To Extreme Music

If there's a question I get asked a lot alongside "did you eat all of that by yourself?" and "what's that episode of Doctor Who where >blank< happened?" it's "how in the name of everything sacred do you listen to that unholy din masquerading as music?"

I grew up listening to my Mum's pop music and my Dad's progressive rock, as a result as I began to explore my own musical tastes and was earning money with which to buy a dozen albums a month I was listening to anything going, pop punk, gangsta rap, 70's prog rock, nu metal and 80's electro. Gradually I realised that my heart truly belonged to heavy metal. I still listen to a bit of everything, variety is the spice of life after all, on my way home from a Cannibal Corpse gig I was bopping to Blondie but metal runs in my veins. I started out like most my age listening to nu metal but I started yearning for something more.

So say you're like me 15 years ago and you want some more bite in your music or you're just curious here are my 6 top tips for getting your ear bent by Death Metal.

• Move beyond the vocals

I'm not going to lie, even I find some vocals difficult to listen to and a lot of people find it an instant turn off but death metal is so much more than someone screaming like they've being fed feet first into a wood chipper. Put the music on with the best headphones available to you and let it flow through you, resist the instinct to turn it off straight away and focus on the intricacies of the melodies (yes they are there!) and the complex drum patterns. You'll see that it's not just demented noise after all.

• Get the lyric book out, but don''t take it seriously

Now you're used to the sounds it's time to get used to the vocals, much like hardcore rap can sound like an auction metal vocals can sound like incoherent screaming. The best way I've discovered to get around this is to follow the lyrics along with the music. Once you've done that for a while you'll start to pick out words by yourself and the whole thing will flow smoothly into your ear holes. Now some of the lyrical content is extreme, murder, mutilation, necrophilia, dark ritual are just some of the topics you'll hear songs about but don't take it seriously. It's there to challenge, to shock, to express anger but not to suggest that you nail next doors dog to their front door, and not all death metal is about murder and mayhem. You'll be surprised by the range and complexity of death metal lyrics, I was listening to The Black Dahlia Murder when I suddenly realised that the song was a take on Edgar Allen Poe's "The Raven".

• YouTube is your friend

Get along to YouTube and just watch the guys and girls play, metal has a reputation of being for dumb idiots who can just about thrash out three cords on a guitar when really that couldn't be further from the truth. These bands write their own songs, play their own instruments (to an insane degree of skill) and make their own videos. Watch those "making the album" behind the scenes videos and listen to the passion and dedication the bands display in making their music. These are attributes that are becoming vanishingly rare in the music industry as a whole, death metal is increasingly becoming the final frontier in music innovation and skill. 

• Read up!

A good way I've found to discover new bands and musical sub genres is to get along to Wikipedia or similar online resources, pop the names of some bands in then check out the section that will usually be there on "influences" and give those bands a try. Give those sub-genre tabs a click and discover a whole new empire of sounds. 

• It's OK not to like it

There will come a point in your exploration where try as you might you just can't get on with the music and that is absolutely fine. Some fans of extreme music will claim that you're not a "real fan" if you don't enjoy 90's Norwegian Black Metal ignoring that fact that some 90's Norwegian Black Metal sounds like it was recorded in a biscuit tin at the bottom of the Marianas Trench while someone throttles a cat. Don''t worry about it, give something else a try and then come back to it. I've found that you have to train yourself to like some extreme music genres so sometimes coming back to an album after 6 months of listening to a different flavour of metal can do the trick. 

• Find a metal head

Most metal listeners will talk the hind legs off a donkey about their favourite bands and want everyone else in the world to hear the albums they love so get down to the nearest record and tape exchange in your town, find the person who specalises in metal and open your mind to the possibilities!

So that's my 6 easy steps to start listening to extreme music, head down to the comments and let me know if you've found this helpful and what bands you're listening to!

Emma Talks Nerdy About: Doctor Who: "Journey To The Centre of The TARDIS"

WARNING: THIS REVIEW HAS SPOILERS

In the storied annals of Doctor Who apart from The Doctor himself there is perhaps no greater mystery than the TARDIS. One thing that always been on my wishlist as a dyed in the wool fangirl (and I suspect a fair few other fanboys and girls lists too) has been "show me more TARDIS!" As much as I love the many varied console rooms and the occasional glimpse of a companions bedroom or a corridor here and there I've always wanted to see the many rooms that reside in an supposedly infinite spaceship. The closest we've got before this episode was the Fourth Doctor adventure "The Invasion of Time" where were The Doctor dragged some reluctant chums round a corridor and an old hall several times while trying to evade Sontarans.  So when "Journey To The Centre of The TARDIS" was announced this was perhaps the most exciting episode on paper as the hopes of seeing something really cool within the TARDIS depths built up.

Unfortunately this episode for me was distinctly average and the promise of some awe inspiring TARDIS moments evaporated as the show wore on. This could have been an episode of virtually any space based sci-fi show as the action was mostly, and infuriatingly for me, confined to dull corridors and the console room. Also being distinctly unhelpful to the average tone of the episode was the deeply bland and forgettable scripting. Stephen Thompson's script was workman like, bland and uninspiring. You got the impression that Matt Smith and Jenna-Louise Coleman were trying their hardest to deliver to their usual high standards but even they couldn't make this script sing. Say what you like about "The Rings of Akhaten" but the script managed to give you dialogue moments that made you smile and taught us more about The Doctor and Clara. If our regulars were struggling then the guest trio of Ashley Walters, Mark Oliver and Jahvel Hall were drowning. Their characters were insignificant to the point of disappearance and seemed to be there purely to cause The Doctor problems for long enough to get the story to 45 minutes and not much else.

In fact I would have much preferred it if this had been a two hander between our regulars. I wish that we had seen some more of the TARDIS's personality coming through, unlike "The Doctor's Wife" we learn nothing new about the Old Girl and that's a really unfortunate oversight for me, I would have liked more exploration of the TARDIS seemingly disliking Clara if nothing else.I must say that despite my misgivings there were some elements to enjoy here, the visual effects were outstanding, I really liked the TARDIS being captured by the salvage vessel and the exploded engine in the white room, the bits of the TARDIS that weren't corridor were intriguing, who knew The Doctor had apparently nicked the telescope after the events of "Tooth and Claw" and that book on the Time War, what I wouldn't give for a look inside those pages! The TARDIS defending itself with looping corridors was a nice element. The monster effects were great, bringing to my mind the climax of  Danny Boyle's "Sunshine".

Despite the good on display my ire towards this episode must be directed at that literal reset button ending, while I generally don't mind stories where time loops back on itself, this is a time travel show after all, the erasure of some pretty massive character development for Clara and The Doctor. The end scene with Tricky and Gregor implies that our heroes seem to retain some memories of events but for me the character of Clara desperately needs some movement forward, these revelations about her from The Doctor and her apparent discovery of his name should have a ton of impact and have her questioning everything but now it's all been reset. What was the point? I would dearly love the super intelligence given to her in "The Bells of St John" put to work as she tries to work out just what it is The Doctor is keeping from her. I'll emphasise again that I'm absolutely fine with time loops but this just wasn't clever enough or witty enough. Moffat has got us all used to elaborate timey-wimey plotting so when someone makes something as ordinary as this it comes as a let down. So, my verdict? An average sci-fi pot boiler with the added disappointment of missed opportunities. Must do better next time.

Emma Talks Nerdy About: Doctor Who "Hide"

WARNING: THIS REVIEW HAS SPOILERS

Let's get this out of the way first of all, there would have been more than a few fans who upon seeing Neil Cross' name on the credits would have dismissed this story out of hand. To say that his first story broadcast two weeks ago "The Rings of Akhaten" was divisive is putting it lightly. The fan reaction here in the UK in was so bilious it even prompted that bastion of journalistic quality The Sun to "write" an "article" about how it was the Worst. Episode. Ever. Coming back from that was going to take one heck of a story, so does "Hide" cut the proverbial mustard?

Well my answer would be a yes, this was a much better script from Cross, an avowed fan of the series, this story is similar in tone to stories like "Ghost Light" and "Day of the Daleks" in that a story that at first appears to be about the paranormal is actually anything but. This script also borrows heavily from those other great British spook house yarns of The Stone Tape and Quatermass but at it's heart this is a story about love and ultimately possible heartbreak. Where this story really sings is in the performances, in particular the guest appearances by Dougray Scott and Jessica Raine as Alec Palmer and Emma Grayling, their blossoming romance will resonate with anyone who has been in the early, nail bitingly awkward stages of a relationship. As for the heartbreak, I think the relationship between The Doctor and Clara is heading for the rocks, the scene about halfway through the episode where Clara has an epiphany about the nature of time travel and confronts The Doctor as he skips through the entirety of the life of planet Earth with nary a care is haunting. It's notable for how much it shakes The Doctor, only able to stutter out in response some bobbins about things being "wibbly". Emma Grayling's warning to Clara about the "sliver of ice" in The Doctor's heart is stunning also, given Clara's intelligence I don't think it'll be much longer before she finds out the truth of The Doctor's interest in her, is it notable that she calls whiskey "the eleventh most disgusting thing in the world"? Only time will tell.

Here mention must also be made of the TARDIS, coming forward as a proper character in this series for the first time since "The Doctor's Wife" just what is the Old Girl's problem with Clara? At first I wondered if Clara represents some sort of paradox that she doesn't like but it seems to be going deeper than that. The TARDIS has coped with people like Amy and River who are much more time screwed than poor old Clara, and she's never felt the need to summon a replica of a companion specifically to have a cat fight. Maybe she's thrown a strop over Matt Smith's pronunciation of the word "Metebelis" (Me-TEB-elis instead of Mete-BEE-lis). Mind you The Doctor isn't always the sharpest tool in the box, maybe he just forgot.

Note must also be made of the excellent design in this episode, just as "The Rings of Akhaten" looked lush and beautiful the design in "Hide" ratchets up the feelings of tension and suspense, about 10 minutes in to the episode I picked up a cup of tea, 10 minutes later it was still hovering an inch from my lips as I entirely forgot about it, so absorbed I was in the story. One of the best choices was how The Crooked Man was shown with frames edited out, creating a herky, jerky and very scary way of moving, the moment when he appears stood behind The Doctor then suddenly disappears evoked a couple of scared squeaks from the sofa I was sat on! The Crooked Man was one of the most interesting alien designs I've ever seen on Doctor Who, almost Lovercraftian, you know you've got a face only a Mother could love when even The Doctor nearly jumps out of his skin when seeing you for the first time. It also leads into the most satisfying part of the story for me where The Doctor reunites The Crooked Man with his Crooked girlfriend/boyfriend *delete as applicable* just because he looks scary and behaved in a scary way because he was frightened doesn't mean he doesn't deserve rescue. While I think this was meant to be the big twist in the story the more satisfying twist for me was the revelation that The Doctor was only really in this place to talk to Emma Grayling about Clara, I wonder if she was holding something back from him given her seeming caution of him. 

Overall this was a satisfying, unexpectedly lovely story, a much more positive step for Neil Cross and setting up some delicious nerd bait for next week. 

Emma Talks Nerdy About: 10 Mad Doctor Who Fan Theories (That Might Just Be True)

This post previously appeared on my other blog emmahyam.wordpress.com

Doctor Who has been with us now for nearly 50 years and naturally in a show with such a long run somethings just don’t make sense. With thousands of hours of televised adventures, hundreds of novels and audio plays, some considered canonical, some not. Some events enshrined into accepted continuity and then retconned back out, some gaps will appear or indeed things that the fans plain just don’t like will be enforced by the producers. Where they do fan theories will step in to fill the holes, here are my top ten favourites, of course your mileage will vary about how convincing they are, as always please read with caution as there be SPOILERS below…

10) The “Five Peri’s” Theory.

After the revelation of Peri’s fate in “Trial of a Timelord” what subsequently happens to her has become somewhat of a mystery with various novels and audio plays either trying to entirely retcon the bizarre decision to marry her off to Yrcanos or have her leave him and somehow get back to Earth. The recent audio play “Peri and the Piscon Paradox” has proposed the idea that there are no fewer than five versions of poor old Peri in existence due to the Time Lords interference in her personal time line, one who was killed in “Mindwarp”, one who married Yrcanos, an older version who only remembers the events of “Planet of Fire” and two others of which nothing is known.

9) The War Chief is a prior regeneration of the Master.

The War Chief is a powerful renegade Time Lord, during the events of “The War Games” he conspires with a very powerful alien race bringing his knowledge of time travel and hypnosis to the table, sound familiar? In terms of personality The War Chief certainly could be the Master, hes arrogant, ambitious, lusts for power and exhibits a fondness for elaborate facial hair. The idea that The War Chief is in fact an earlier incarnation of the Master certainly hold some weight on this basis, the idea first came about when “The Doctor Who Role Playing Game” claimed that The Meddling Monk, The War Chief and The Master were all different incarnations of the same Time Lord. This idea has been accepted as unofficial canon and then contradicted in equal measure with some novels using it as an established fact and some directly stating that this is not the case.

8 ) The Doctor was being metaphorical when he said he was half-human.

This idea originated in fan circles in reaction to the Eighth Doctor’s statement that he was “half human on his mothers side” in the TV Movie. The TV Movie aka “The Enemy Within” presented many problems with canon to say the least but The Doctor coming out with this ‘revelation’ lead to fandom nearly imploding with rage. The implications of The Doctor not being entirely Time Lord were massive, how did he regenerate? How was he brought up Gallifrey if he was partially human? Who on Earth was his mother? The questions raised seemed endless, however a way out presented itself by dismissing the statement as being entirely factious. The Doctor, especially in his later incarnations, is a pretty sarcastic and the king of the wind up and as such the remark can be interpreted as affectionate or a joke. Just as the Eleventh Doctor’s remark to Clyde in The Sarah Jane Adventures episode “Death of the Doctor” that he can regenerate 507 times has been filed under “disregard as joke” by fandom so has The Doctor’s claim to half-humanity.

7) Time Lords only gain their second heart after their first regeneration.

When the first Doctor claims to Ian Chesterton that he is not from Earth, the long suffering science teacher puts his ear to the Doctors chest… and hears nothing unusual, the Doctor must only have one heart beating. We know from the third doctor that having two hearts is the norm for Time Lords, his medical tests during “Spearhead From Space” confirm it and many times since then it has been explicitly stated or shown, after all the seventh Doctor is killed because of Grace’s misunderstanding of his binary hearts. So something must change between the first and third Doctors, the most popular explanation is that a Time Lord only gains a second heart once they’ve regenerated for the first time.

6) Claire Bloom’s character in “The End of Time” is The Doctor’s mother.

The mystery of who exactly Claire Bloom’s character is in “The End of Time” will probably never be resolved on screen and as such the wild speculation as to her precise identity began almost as soon as the credits rolled on the episode. The most popular explanation among fans is that she is The Doctor’s mother, in his book “The Writers Tale” Russell T Davies stated that this was his thinking behind the character but he left it deliberately ambiguous. The tenth Doctor’s reaction to her certainly backs up the hypothesis but now RTD has left the series and he did not give an in-episode explanation she could be given any number of alternative identities. Other popular alternative identities include Romana, Susan, Susan’s mother (i.e. The Doctor’s biological daughter), Jenny or even Chancellor Flavia the former Time Lord President.

5) The Third Doctor has a prisoner tattoo

In the third Doctor’s first episode “Spearhead From Space” we are treated to the sight of the Doctor getting out of the shower, while he holding a towel a tattoo of a cobra can be seen on his right forearm (see picture above) in reality the tattoo was Jon Pertwee’s which he got during his days in the navy. No explanation was ever given on screen but the novel “Christmas on a Rational Planet” and fandom at large theorised that it was a criminal brand given to him by the Time Lords and that once they rescinded his exile they stopped it appearing on his next regeneration. A possible interesting (but quite tangential) moment in “The Doctor’s Wife” that could lend the theory further credence is that The Doctor’s fellow Time Lord The Corsair wears a tattoo on all his/her regenerations, a Oroborus, a snake eatings its own tail. When The Doctor discovers it on Auntie the tattoo is on the left arm, is it possible that The Corsair was also a criminal and first given that mark by the Time Lords?

4) The fifth Doctor is the final incarnation of the original Doctor. The Sixth Doctor is a reincarnation, and the beginning of a new 13 body lifecycle.

In the episode “The Brain of Morbius” The Doctor challenges the renegade Time Lord Morbius to an ancient, dangerous Time Lord challenge, a Mind Bending Contest (see picture above). They square up at the machine and The Doctor’s previous incarnations flash up on a screen, the third, the second, the first… and then an unfamiliar face flashes up, then another and another as Morbius screams “back! Back through your past!” Eight in all flash by. If all those faces were previous Doctors then that means that the person who we all thought was the fourth Doctor is actually the twelfth! When the fifth Doctor (or should that be thirteenth?) regenerates he says “it feels different this time” and then transforms into the sixth Doctor… or begins a brand new lifecycle and is in fact the first Doctor… again. This theory has also been used to explain the sixth Doctor’s unhinged behavior and total confusion. This theory has been utterly debunked by virtually every other piece of Doctor Who canon, “The Brain of Morbius” was written some time before the 13 regeneration limit was established and the series (especially post 2005) has gone to great pains to establish that The Doctor we are watching is either the ninth, tenth or eleventh and that William Hartnell was the very first Doctor. The faces that we see in the mind bending machine have been explained away as being previous faces of Morbius and that he was just ranting when he said “how long have you lived?”… or was he?

3) The Time War was the cause of the 8th Doctor regenerating into the 9th.

This is an idea that has now been generally accepted into the canon, the tenth Doctor implies in “Journey’s End” that the ninth Doctor was “born into battle”, its easy to imagine the eighth Doctor sacrificing himself to time lock the Daleks and Time Lords and leaving an emotionally scarred, newly regenerated ninth Doctor to walk away. This is one of the theories that will probably be an accepted albeit unstated part of the canon until we get an alternative presented on screen.

2) Series 6b

This is the big one, the granddaddy of all fan theories, first raised by Paul Cornell, writer of Doctor Who novels, audio plays and episodes for the new series. It explains continuity discrepancies in the Second Doctor’s life as it expands on televised Doctor Who canon and places new adventures for the Second Doctor between The War Games and the first appearance of the Third Doctor at the start of Spearhead from Space. There are two continuity errors in “The Two Doctors” which can only explained by the existence of a series 6b where The Doctor was working for the Time Lords, firstly why the second Doctor and Jamie look visibly older and secondly why the Doctor had a remote controlled TARDIS which no other Doctor has had before or since. Despite series 6b being a neat explanation it also raises plenty of problems on its own if accepted as part of official canon.

1) The “Take 5″ Theory.

This theory, first suggested in the excellent book "Shooty Dog Thing", proposes that every incarnation of the Doctor is most like the incarnation that came five changes previously, so the sixth Doctor is like the first Doctor, the seventh is like the second, the eighth is like the third and so on. On the face of it this theory makes quite a lot of sense, for instance the seventh Doctor is a mysterious trickster of short stature who people constantly underestimate, quite like the second doctor. The theory seems especially convincing in the case of the tenth and fifth Doctors, just watch “Time Crash” which is essentially ten minute long proof of this theory in action! Unfortunately this theory hits a major roadblock in the fourth and ninth Doctors as the ninth Doctor could not be further removed from the fourth Doctor if you tried, I await the twelfth incarnation of the Doctor with baited breath, if only to see if they’re anything like the seventh Doctor…

Have you got any strange theories? What do you think of these ones? Let me know in the comments!

Emma Talks Nerdy About: Doctor Who "Cold War"

WARNING: THIS REVIEW HAS SPOILERS

Much as last week, the trailers gave the  impression that we seem to be continuing with a modified rerun of Series 5, so would this be the equivalent of "Victory of the Daleks"? More on that question as progress...

Joining the 60s/Second Doctor revival along with the Great Intelligence are the Ice Warriors and fittingly they've chosen that most Second Doctorish of settings, the "base under siege" story. As has been so far proven with the Great Intelligence that although these ideas are best part of 45 years old, if it ain't broke, don't fix it. I really enjoyed this particular setting, I was born in 1983 and I remember the Cold War as it was stumbling its way to its eventual thaw with the collapse of the Soviet Union in 1991. It's easy to forget what a knife edge the world was on. The Doctor's explanation of the events to Clara initially brought me up short, come on, everyone remembers this, I thought, but then it came to me that not only is Clara only 24, born in 1989 but also the target audience of young teenagers wouldn't necessarily be aware either. Gatiss did well to remind me that more than a few viewers are probably of a post millennial vintage and not 30 something's like myself. It was also a handy refresher of the "fixed moments in time" idea, I've got a sneaky suspicion we'll be seeing more of that this series! However while he was handily explaining the new (the TARDIS translation also got a refresher) we got the return of the TARDIS H.A.D.S (standing for "Hostile Action Displacement System) which has not seen in action since the Second Doctor adventure "The Krotons". Mark Gatiss very firmly nailing his fan colours to the wall there.

Gatiss, also being a horror aficionado knows that the best thing to do with your monster is to show as little of it as possible and let your audiences imagination do the rest. But he does this in a surprising way, breathing fresh life into the Ice Warriors by revealing a previously unseen ability and bringing new richness to this alien culture. The only slight complaint I heard among my fan chums was the lack of hissed "ssssss" sounds, so prevalent in their first incarnation. I wasn't too put out by it myself though, much like the early Cybermen their speech, although creepy made them hard to understand at times, especially on a watching on a wonky third generation VHS copy! Mind you adding to the culture does open the opportunity for pitfalls I do hope that they don't end up being Doctor Who's equivalent to the Klingons, all obsessed with personal honour and unnecessary shouting. However I feel that Gatiss was being reigned back slightly, in sure in an ideal world he would have ramped up the gore and tension but this is on at 6pm with the whole family watching. That scene of Skaldak clutching and stroking the head of Lieutenant Stepashin as he desperately negotiates for his life was plenty scary by itself.

As a lover of that Arnold Schwarzenegger magnum opus Predator I had more than a few reminders of it in this story, the crew being picked off one by one by being yanked into the ceiling, the unnatural speed and most of all the crackling, creaking hissing. If I have one criticism of the story it is that it seemed to lack that last killer blow that moves a story from good to great, whether he was restrained by the time slot or just didn't quite know how to resolve the story in the time remaining we may never know but as with Gatiss' previous efforts the wait for this viewer at least for him to deliver a truly great Doctor Who script goes on. Despite the criticism I've leveled at his writing what Gatiss really gets right is character, Matt Smith reigns in the Doctors goofy side for this weeks outing however his reaction to Skaldak behind him prompted a few giggles. If this episode was a homage to the Second Doctor's time then Matt Smith's performance was equal to Patrick Troughton's Doctor. Of all of his previous incarnations it's the Second Doctor I can see most here, whether running around corridors, accidentally breaking bits off the sub or passionately pleading for Skaldak to show mercy. Jenna-Louise Coleman is great as always confronted with her first really hairy situation travelling with the Doctor she copes admirably, combining a believable mix of terror and sheer curiosity. Steven Moffat has described these three episodes as an opening trio of stories and I feel that now we've really got to know her.

Mention must also be made of the guest cast, David Warner's pop music obsessed Professor was lovely I loved that all he really wanted to know about the future was if Ultravox had split up! And I really enjoyed Liam Cunnigham's Captain Zhukov pragmatic, noble and reigning in the blood thirst of his young second in command. I thought it was an interesting choice to set the action on a Soviet sub, it would have been all too easy to make it a British boat, its nice the soviets aren't mustache twirling villains, they're just men doing a job. So back to my opening question is this Series 5 take two? Well no, instead we a got a new take on Series 1's "Dalek", much as Rose was instrumental in breaking through to whatever passes for compassion in a Dalek, Clara uses the same methodology on Skaldak, citing his choice to show her and Gisenko mercy. While Dalek is a much superior story to Cold War, this is by itself a fine effort and probably Gatiss best Doctor Who script to date however I'm most interested to see if he can finally deliever that killer script later in this series.

Emma Talks Nerdy About: Doctor Who "The Rings of Akhaten"

WARNING: THIS REVIEW HAS SPOILERS

Last week in this here humble blog I compared "The Bells of St John" to "The Eleventh Hour" so would The Rings of Akhaten be Clara's equivalent of "The Beast Below"? Thus far in post 2005 Doctor Who the companions first ventures onto an alien planet/through time have been less that great, in series one The Doctor seems to think Rose will enjoy seeing her home planet incinerated but instead she's nearly murdered by a gobby trampoline, Martha ends up in Elizabethan England where she repeatedly sleazily chatted up by William Shakespeare, Donna gets to watch people get slaughtered by a volcano eruption and Amy has the treat of the dystopian nightmare of Starship UK and getting covered in Space Whale barf.

So how does Clara get on? Surprisingly well actually, she only suggests legging it about half an hour after I would have floated it as a possibility! The first trip for a companion these days is as much what the army call a "bottle test" as an adventure, so The Doctor can see if they've got the right stuff to travel with him and I would say that Clara passes with flying colours. Indeed I can imagine The Doctor observing from the shadows as Clara comforts the terrified Merry. Once again Jenna-Louise Coleman was on sparkling form in this episode, she was asked to do a lot in this outing and she rose to all the challenges presented.

 Demonstrating a willingness to get stuck in with a mad collection of alien life, dropping everything to hold the hand of a little girl and giving us a tantalizing glimpse of a possible future where she demanded to know if she was a replacement for someone from the doctors past. I don't imagine she's going to be too happy when she discovers the full extent of what's been happening, and remember that the doctor left a portrait of a former Clara in a 13th century monastery! Potential for quite the conflict there. Matt Smith is usually excellent so when he decides to step up the next level it leaves this viewer with her jaw on the floor "That Speech" as I've seen it referred to around the interwebz was just astonishing, interestingly it was also pretty much the exact opposite on the one Davros makes in the episode "Journeys End" maybe The Doctor is taking some speech making tips from his old nemesis!

Where that soliloquy speaks of the comprehensive destruction of everything The Doctor talks about how out of chaos the unique entity that is you is created. Mind you this wasn't the only speech The Doctor busts out here, his Blade Runner-esque rant at Grandfather is pretty effective to say the least but as you'd expect from Clara she's the one who ultimately saves the day. For me it also serves as a useful rebuttal to everyone who thinks this doctor is entirely too silly for his own good. Away from the acting this episode seems to have caused quite the division, 50% loved it whereas 50% found it to be a load of sentimental old tosh. First time writer Neil Cross previously of astonishingly grim crime drama Luther doesn't quite hit all the marks, the story feels sluggish and too drawn out to fill the 45 minute running time, fans will also be reminded of more than a few other post 2005 stories the sentient sun from "42" the group hymn from"Gridlock" The Doctors confrontation with Grandfather is much like him shouting at The Devil in "The Satan Pit" and the story overall is to me like a less depressing "The Beast Below" The Vigil were about as close to The Winders from that story as you dare get.

All this being said I think I firmly fall in the "love it" category, being a sentimental old git myself the bits where Clara gets her Mum's ring back and gives up "the most important leaf in the universe" had me looking around for the Kleenex. It surprised me that this story thread was paid off so early in Clara's journey, maybe Moffat is wary of introducing too many little mysteries into the narrative for fears of making her Amy Pond 2: Electric Boogaloo. I loved the design choices in this episode too, all the reds and golds made it feel lush and added to a sense of terrible beauty emanating from Grandfather. Ultimately this episode was a somewhat weak story saved by some truly top notch acting, some lovely script work and beautiful design and subsequently it feels like it becomes more than the sum of its parts.

Emma Talks Nerdy About: Killswitch Engage "Disarm The Descent"

Disarm The Descent album cover

Disarm The Descent is an album that should not exist, in the wake of the departure of lead vocalist Howard Jones whose soaring and powerful vocals propelled Killswitch Engage to metal mega stardom would cause many a band to simply implode, however KsE dusted themselves down, re-recruited old vocalist Jesse Leach and then have proceeded to make their strongest album for the best part of a decade.

Leach was with the band when they gave the US metal scene an almighty kick up the bum with 2002 release "Alive or Just Breathing" when just they were on the cup of breaking into the big time Leach departed the band to deal with a myriad of personal problems. The band then brought aboard former Blood Has Been Shed frontman Howard Jones who stepped in seemingly effortlessly, with Jones the band released their seminal 2004 effort "The End of Heartache" an album of wall to wall anthems. Many fans of the band instantly took to Jones, he is able to combine richness and power in clean vocals and somehow deliver equally stunning screams. However after the meteoric successes the subsequent album releases 2006s "As Daylight Dies" and 2009s "Killswitch Engage" showed a tiredness in the band, it felt like they were treading water and in particular Jones' lyrics became more depressive and lackluster.

Killswitch Engage circa 2013

Cut back to 2013 and Disarm The Descent sees Killswitch Engage returning to the highs to 2004, the track "The New Awakening" has gig anthem written all over it, "In Due Time" is the clear radio friendly single from this album, as off putting as some fans might find this concept it's a great example of the evolution of Jesse Leach's clean vocal skills. For a band mostly known for their melodic, hooky style they incorporate a surprising amount of heaviness in this record. "The Turning Point" is the stand out track here, a super crunchy opening followed by an excellent beat down, the clean Jesse vocals Vs Adam D's growls and clean backing vocals complement each other beautifully, something they rejuvenated in their collaboration in Times of Grace's "Hymn of a Broken Man" Leach brings and audible enthusiasm which Jones lacked after The End Of Heartache.

The band is back to lyrical core of positivity and love that separates Killswitch Engage from other bands, Jesse isn't as skilled a singer as Howard but as the record is an audible return to "Alive or Just Breathing" this addition of rawness and desperation just make the album more effective. Disarm The Descent won't be winning any album of the year awards and anyone picking up this album hoping for a whole new direction for the band is going to disappointed, what this album represents is a solid if not world shattering return to form after two flabby missteps.This albums true strength is that this albu
 m proves that in 2013 the European melo-death influenced US metal still has something relevant to say for itself.

Emma Talks Nerdy About: Doctor Who "The Bells of St John"

WARNING: THIS REVIEW HAS SPOILERS

It's the most wonderful time of the year, no gentle reader not Christmas or Talk Like A Pirate Day, it's time once again to welcome The Doctor back into living rooms all over the country. So with around 150 of my fellow fans I squeezed into a tiny pub somewhere in the frozen centre of London and turned my ear to The Bells of St John.

The typically madcap trailers leading up to this episode lead me to believe that this was going to be The Eleventh Hour take two, and that is no bad thing considering that The Eleventh Hour is one of my favourite stories since the 2005 return. For me this episode was The Eleventh Hour refined, where that episode can feel a little overwhelming as it races through timezones, plot points and baddies The Bells of St John takes all those beats and slows them down enough so that you can take in everything in one, beautifully crafted hit. This is exactly what I wanted to see in a series opener, it's light, tons of fun, literally laugh a minute and packed full of smashing performances. This is a example of how Doctor Who is a show for everybody, young, old, sci-fi fan or no I think a person who had never seen a minute of Doctor Who in their lives would find as much to enjoy here as a seasoned veteran of the Whoniverse.

Matt Smith and Jenna-Louise Coleman build on the momentum and chemistry they developed in The Snowmen, it feels like they've been doing the show together forever and they bounce around and off each other marvelously. Matt Smith is probably at his most "Second Doctor-ish" here, leaping about the place like Tigger one moment, brooding in a cassock the next. There was also some subtle touches in his acting that I only picked up second time round, check out the moment where he resigns himself to helping Clara "find the Wi-Fi" he drops into the bored monotone of a put upon IT helpdesk callcentre worker which made the  pub I was in laugh out loud. I loved the tenderness he brought through in this episode, the care he displayed towards Clara was one of a concerned friend rather that the romance angle so hated by some sections of fandom. After all only a true friend would start eating a biscuit then thoughtfully leave you half to enjoy upon waking up! Coleman was no slouch either, moving effortlessly from IT illiterate Nanny who dreams of travelling to saving a plane from plummeting to the ground (all while clutching a mug of coffee!), I really enjoyed the way she chose to portray Clara's growing knowledge thanks to being partially downloaded, laughing in a combination of excitement and nervousness as she effortlessly hacks into the impregnable Great Intelligence network.

Oswining!

Above all  though I absolutely loved this script by Doctor Who supremo The Moff, remember when I said this was laugh a minute? That's not an exaggeration, the fans I was with at the pub were giggling away at not only the physical comedy like the moment where The Doctor slowly winds the cable from the TARDIS phone around a hapless monk but also at some extremely nerdy in jokes, like when the drones at The Shard accidentally identify a phone box at Earls Court as the TARDIS. In the real world there is actually an old 1960s police box outside Earls Court Underground station, I've had my picture taken with it on more than one occasion. In typical Moffat style the baddie of the piece is something ordinary made scary, this time the Wi-Fi soup we all live in nowadays. The script also set up the forthcoming episodes nicely, the return of The Great Intelligence was unexpected and most welcome, again handily building on the momentum from last Christmas and there are lots of little mysteries that I think will have us coming back to this episode for a rewatch come the end of episode 8. Why are the ages of 16 and 23 missing from Clara's travel book? Who was the woman who gave Clara the number for the TARDIS? And just what is The Great Intelligence up to?

In conclusion this was a great start to the series, clutch to your sofas you clever fans, and enjoy...